In the "News" today.

knecht wrote:

National Cleavage Day. Which pair of tits will you vote for?

Milliband and balls.

Sir Francis Drake wrote:

OMG!

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OMG2. It gets worse.

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owch  

He ought to patent it - could make a fortune.

The guys a lunatic but having said that you have to admire him. He's now saying that if they don't amputate his arm he's doing to cut that off as well! I know myself that nerve damage and constant pain wears you out but, they may remove his arm and he could still end up with ghost pains once the limb is removed. The bloke needs some proper support, once the hospitals have run out of surgical options you tend to be left on your own, help him before he kills himself.

knecht wrote:

He ought to patent it - could make a fortune.

The French made a far better one......he wouldn't have a leg to stand on if he tried to patent it.

Free at the point of delivery irrespective of personal wealth?

Christ - I'm speechless at this pile of shite published in the Evening Herald tonight
Herald rubbish

Once upon a time, I used to enjoy perusing the 'Erald' - mostly when it was only available in print.

It may be me getting even more cynical in my old age, but, since going on-line, it seems full of non-events, local shite latching onto a national theme, dirge and Jeremy Kyle-esque Jannermorphic crap.

#rantlikeabastard.

Person Of Interest wrote:

Once upon a time, I used to enjoy perusing the 'Erald' - mostly when it was only available in print.

It may be me getting even more cynical in my old age, but, since going on-line, it seems full of non-events, local shite latching onto a national theme, dirge and Jeremy Kyle-esque Jannermorphic crap.

#rantlikeabastard.

I completely agree POI - it's just a load of inane crap - a vehicle for stupid articles like this one and publishing PR articles for the great and the good in an attempt to try and brainwash Janners into believing that cock eyed plans such as HHP are a great idea.

I guess the hyena had the last laugh then. 

HOT OFF THE PRESS

For all you blues lovers......... Coming to the Calstock Old Chapel early next year ..... Paul Jones & Dave Kelly - the founders of the Blues Band. Two seasoned pros of the blues scene.

And if you do like a bit of blues harp & dobro slide guitar (with an emphasis on folk as well), come & see Hannah Martin & Phillip Henry on May 10th.

Meanwhile, three of the last four gigs have enjoyed it so much that they immediately asked to come again (and the fourth was coming back anyway as part of a season of his performances). Be there or be square.

That's not news is it. Meh!

This is news.

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Body of a man was hanging up a tree for two years.

hairy j wrote:

That's not news is it. Meh!

This is news.

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Body of a man was hanging up a tree for two years.

"A Bournemouth man discovered further ‘bones’ at the site ‘months’ ago, but failed to alert police." As you don't....

But he saved them just in case.

I found that peculiar to be honest. If you find bones in a park, shouldn't your first instinct, if you even have a slight inklng that they could be human, be to call the police and NOT take them home?

In other police related news....

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The Tavvy Times is brilliant for non news as we don't really get news in Tavvy. Once we had a murder in a car in a car park and the Times led with "Poison weed scare for ponies on Moor!"

Where I used to live, the competition was to count how many references to dog-shit on the pavements you could find in the local paper. And if you managed to get a letter printed on the subject that was a real achievement.

I got caught shoplifting sweets aged 11 and it made the North Devon Journal, "Schoolboy receives caution for shop theft" was the heading, oh the shame.

Iggy wrote:

I got caught shoplifting sweets aged 11 and it made the North Devon Journal, "Schoolboy receives caution for shop theft" was the heading, oh the shame.

It's that sort of behaviour that gives ATD a bad name.

Go take a shower Knecht.

I had one last week!

Just 6 days before the kick off and a vital match?!

What exciting stories make the Calstock News?