The Lighten The Mood Thread.

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I see Maplins have reduced their SAD lights down to £44.99. That should make a few people happy.

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hairy j wrote:

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ATD mods approve of this thread.

Hairy on the right seeks approval for using the word Muslim in a joke.

I wish I had that much hair.

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Funny as fook that is.

Pictures with TEXT - if you have to explain the joke, it's shit.

I advise every one to buy some googly eyes from an art supplier.

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I must work out how to post the picture and not just the link    

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Richard Blight wrote:

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I must work out how to post the picture and not just the link    

Them square brackets [ ]

Do this [

Then type img

Then put another after it ]

Then do another [

Then do a forward slash /

Then do img

Then do ]

Put the url in between.

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There you go Blighty.

I love Mr Tourette

Spoilering for rudeness

Spoiler:

Thanks Hairy,

I'll have a play with that later.

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Subject: FW: Fwd: If You Don't Know What Aplomb Means Here's An Example...................















Downton Abbey - "Aplomb"




His Lordship was in the study at Downton Abbey when the butler approached

and coughed discreetly.

"May I ask you a question, My Lord?"

"Go ahead, Carson ," said His Lordship.

"I am doing the crossword in The Times and I have found a word

I am not too clear on."

"What word is that?" asked His Lordship.

"Aplomb," My Lord.

"Now that's a difficult one to explain.

I would say it is self-assurance or complete composure."

"Thank you, My Lord, but I'm still a little confused."

"Let me give you an example to make it clearer. Do you remember

a few months ago when the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge arrived to spend

a weekend with us?"

"I remember the occasion very well, My Lord. It gave the sta ff

and myself much pleasure to look after them."

"Also," continued the Earl of Grantham, "do you remember when

Wills plucked a rose for Kate in the rose garden?"

"I was present on that occasion, My Lord, ministering to their needs.

"While plucking the rose, a thorn embedded itself in his thumb very deeply."

"I witnessed the incident, M y Lord, and saw the Duchess herself

remove the thorn and bandage his thumb with her own dainty handkerchief."

"That evening the prick on his thumb was so sore. Kate had to cut

up his venison from our own estate, even though it was extremely tender."

"Yes, My Lord, I did see everything that transpired that evening."

"The next morning while you were pouring coffee for Her Ladyship,

Kate inquired of Wills with a loud voice, 'Darling, does your prick still throb?'

And you, Carson, did not spill one drop of coffee! THAT is aplomb."






























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